No Road Head Today

So, we're driving home from the Doctor's office and so far it's been a good day.  At least a decent day.  No fighting, no fussing.  We even had a good little lunch together at a cool restaurant we've both been wanting to go to.

Anyways, on the way home while driving on the highway we get to talking and we kind of both realized that we haven't even had sex for the day.  WTF!!!  Side note - I have a rule to get an attitude if we don't have sex : ) and she knows it...LOL.  I know...I'm evil.  So anyways, we both realize this and I said she could give me some road head and from her body language I could tell she was game!  But we also have a couple of other dilemmas going on at the same time.

For 1 the kids are getting out of school and they didn't know no one was going to be home & the house was locked up.  It's of course that time and we're trying to call them to let them know that we left the back door unlocked for them to get in, so we had to wait 5 minutes of us calling until they finally answered...You know how it is when you got kids.  Gotta get them squared away before any hanky-panky.

And then 2...which popped up a little while we were at the Doctor's office.  She starts dropping hints that she's been talking to her little brother and now I'm starting to learn that we may have to pick up his 1 year old daughter from some girl that was watching her for the baby's mother...This little girl's parents are a whole other story that I really don't want to get into.  Long story short they are both addicts and we'll just leave it at that.  On the way home while trying to call my daughters to make sure they could get inside the house after school and not freeze outside in this Kansas winter my wife is dealing with the issue of her niece that I really am just now starting to learn about.  I'm trying to get my kids in and my wife is trying to worry about some other bs and enabling her niece's mom to go be worthless.  I'm kind of getting a little pissed bc I know how my wife is...she just wants to get involved in some stupid shit she/we could completely avoid, but by this time my wife is calling my oldest daughter to go pick up her niece.  Now that tax time is over these dumb ass losers probably don't care about their kids after they got their tax return money - basically for having kids...as a matter of fact it's 11pm and my little niece is here at my home sleeping...keep in mind we haven't seen any of this family in at least a year.  The mom & my wife's little brother are not together and it's just a mess.

So long story short NO ROAD HEAD, and the whole situation ended up in a big argument...

I still had to pick my car up at the shop where it was getting an oil change, and the wife was planning on making a special dinner for my oldest daughter's husbands birthday...which kind of pisses me off too bc sometimes it feels like she doesn't do shit for me...sometimes like I'm last on her list...

Anyways, all plans went to shit.  No road head.  I didn't get to pick up my car.  I'll have to do that tomorrow if I can find someone to give me a ride to it.  My wife didn't make her special dinner for my son-in-law...who didn't even come over to my house...he had to go to his grandmas.  Our argument got even worse because she didn't want to take me out to get my car bc she wanted make this special dinner and I was driving and told her she's going with me anyways.  I told her if she wanted out - to jump out while the car was moving!  I actually thought that was kind of funny at the moment.  She did not.  I drove some but then just decided to take her dumb ass home.  Or is it I'm the dumb ass for marrying her and staying with her.  It's kind of too late now.  We'll have been married 19 years this year.  Honestly we don't argue that much & we run a home-based business together, so we're with each other all the time...I mean every motha fuckin' day, so I don't know what to do some times.  Because I'm fucked if I leave her. I'll lose my nice ass house that I just paid $20k for a master bath remodel, etc... and I'm miserable if I stay.  I know I'll lose most of my stuff if I divorce, and then most likely have to pay alimony and will definitely have to pay child support.  Faaaaaaaccckkkk!

Now I'm in my basement chilling by myself which I actually enjoy, and I'm also going to sleep in my spare bedroom tonight...by myself.  I actually like sleeping in there because it's in the basement with no windows in that room, and I'll just sleep in.

I know a lot of people that are in relationships that are straight fucked up...it's usually a good dad with a POS mother that cheats on her husband...this seems to be more & more common.  The husband usually stays with the POS wife because of the kids (#1 reason,) and then of course they still do love their wife, and then it's also because as a man we get taken to the cleaners in a divorce. And then have you ever noticed when you have friends that end a relationship the girl hooks up with a new guy in like a month or 2.  And it will take the guys like 2 years, or more, to hook up with a new chick to try to be happy again. This is how our society is...

It's kind of like a viscous cycle.  When a guy first hooks up with a woman everyone is in love and all lovey dovey, but the honeymoon phase wears off after a while.  Both the woman and man get stuck in their daily routines and the romance fades a little. The woman doesn't want to have sex as much like when they first hooked up. The man is stressed out on how to pay the bills, and make enough money to take his family on vacation once a year while still trying to please his wife with an expensive car, jewelry, clothes, purses, pedicures, manicures, getting their hair done and lots of other stupid expensive shit that adds up because hey she's married to me and she deserves the finer things in life, right?  But what happens on the woman's side when the romance fades a little...and she's an attractive woman?  Well I'll tell you what happens is she doesn't get the attention she used to get from you like she once did during the honeymoon phase (most likely from lack of sex) and all these other guys who are single (or not) are constantly trying to be nice, and go out of their way for her, and show her all the attention bc yeah they'd love to fuck the shit out of her too...even if just once to imprint into their memory's...and of course the woman eventually gives in to one of these guys and then bam...shit's fucked up!!

What's a guy to do anymore?  It's hard to be a good man, husband, father, role-model, do the right thing all the time no matter what, and to be a leader in the community.  I don't know maybe I just married the wrong girl, but does that mean I'm fucked for life now?  Because of the mistake I made when I was in my early 20's and young & dumb and full of....lol...it could be worse right???

MARRIAGE AND SEX...WHO HAS THE UPPER HAND?

Is it me or does every husband deal with this same issue...My wife will usually refer to sex as her giving me some.  WTF!  She has this whole thing twisted around!  It is no longer a mutual agreement.  It's her going out of her way to "give me some."  Like she doesn't get nothing out of it!  I guess this is how it goes after being married for almost 14 years.

So what do I do about it, you asked?  It's simple.  It's called porn!  I love it!

I've also figured a couple of things out along the way too, but I probably couldn't have without some good ol' porn to help a brotha out in some pretty rough times. What I figured out is that my wife still wants to have sex...and with me...just not as often!  Our sex cycle is different that's all.  I want to have sex usually 2 to 3 times a day.  My wife thinks I have some type of sex addiction...I told her I'm just a man.  My wife probably wants to have sex around 2 to 3 times a week.  Like I said...thank God for porn...and thank God for letting me be able to watch it on my phone!  Man, it must have sucked being a husband back in the good old days before the internet and smart phones.

So now I don't ask for sex no more, and on top of that it's no longer her "giving me some." Now a days it's more like her asking me to give her some!  I guess we could call this technology of the internet, smart phones, and free porn another small step for mankind because without it...I don't think I would be the only one in trouble.

My wife lives in "The Bubble"

So have you seen that Jerry Seinfeld episode where Elaine is dating an above average looking guy who she claims gets basically everything handed to him and is favored in life as a result of his good looks?

Well that episode hits pretty close to home...not for me, but for my wife!

Some people might say that I "married up."  At least in the looks department...but what other department matters, right?  I'll give you an example.  The other day my wife went to the bank to deposit some checks, and she gets offered a job!  Just like that!  She could be a serial killer for all they know, but I guess that doesn't matter.  And that's not the first time she's been offered a job on the spot. It happens all of the time. As a matter of fact my wife has never even had a real job or at least a full-time job.  Wait she actually did have a full time job once where she got paid for full time and worked maybe 3 hours!  You get my point. 

Life must be nice, right?

I guess I should consider myself fortunate to have been lucky enough to marry such a beautiful woman...even if her outlook on life is a little distorted.

My Wife Thinks I Am A Mind Reader

I can't be the only one who has this problem.  Example...I will be working on something in deep thought, and my wife pops off something about something that I have no idea what the hell she is talking about!  How in the hell can I know what in the hell she is talking about.  I'm a person too, right?  Which means I have my own things going on and I am constantly working on my 50% of the things a man needs to worry about when being in a relationship.  Or at least that's what I thought going into marriage that this was going to be a 50/50 relationship!

Yeah right!  It's more like I take care of 65% of the family, house, dogs, cars, bills, you know all the good ol marriage stuff.  And as life goes on it seems that now I have to know what this crazy ass woman is thinking...almost to the point to where she probably thinks that I should be finishing her sentences.  What's also crazy about the whole ordeal is she gets mad and asks me a question about her work from over a week ago and I don't know what the f#%* she's talking about. 

What can a man do?  I guess keep doing what I've been doing...and maybe work on my mindreading...